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It’s 2.35 am. I took sleeping again. It kills my body but my brain is still awake. I don’t want to sleep. I want to stay up, I want to scroll mindlessly on social media. Berating myself for not sleeping. I want to cry. I hate myself. …

It’s 12:34 am.

Well, I guess it’s not to bad compare to other night owls out there. People stay up until 4 am or even worse they up until noon.

But I know where this is going, I will end up staying very late.

I did my meditation before bed. I had hot milk. I took my sleeping pills. And here I am. Still fucking awake.

My brain is refusing to go to sleep.

I made a plan tomorrow with my friend, Jodie. I guess I will have to cancel it now.

This is a serious problem. Sleep is the most important thing. I just don’t understand my body is doing this to me.

I have to see a doctor. But, I know they will just give me another prescription for sleeping pills. I can’t take them anymore.

I need help.

I used to complain almost every day. On everything. On everyone. Work, food, horrible service at a store, stupid and unforgivable friends, people who do not have the sense to respect people’s spaces in public transport, messy house, a milkshake that is not cold enough, a new staff who couldn’t…


My name is Anne. My weird obsession is soap. I contemplate (and complaining) about life the most out of anyone on earth. I was a scientific writer for a while.

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